Maladicta von Borogravia (![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
deshabille) wrote2013-05-19 08:53 pm
deshabille) wrote2013-05-19 08:53 pm
two ☼ backdated; private + spam + voice
private/voice | separately to charles, erik, anya (backdated 5/19)
A word, if you have a moment.
private/text | pietro (backdated 5/19)
CES, then library. Half an hour.
spam | CES (backdated 5/19)
[It's evening by the time she comes back here. Things look familiar in the way that they might have been part of a dream, once; cement and steel and dust and grime. She looks at the structures appraisingly, neither pleased nor displeased by them. They're just there. Just something that she might face, soon enough.]
[She's trained already, but she doesn't need rest, so she runs, fast and in as indirect a pattern as she can. Even stopping and starting, dodging imaginary pursuit, she's a blur, her eyes narrowed to slits against the dirt in the air. She learns the feel of the structures as she uses them for leverage when she hits top speed. It doesn't take long, too, before she's climbing, which is slower but not much.]
[Soon enough she finds herself at the top of an abandoned, half-constructed building, only a few stories tall but higher than anything she'd have found in Borogravia but a steeple. She sits with her feet hanging over the edge and considers her options from here. She has made her first decision, and now . . . here come all the rest.]
voice | 5/19, immediately post-paintball
Well. That was fun.
( ooc; SO i completely didn't do anything with paintball because of work, so feel free to assume anything re: mal being extremely serious about paintball once she actually learned the rules. she was 4th floor, blue team. )
A word, if you have a moment.
private/text | pietro (backdated 5/19)
CES, then library. Half an hour.
spam | CES (backdated 5/19)
[It's evening by the time she comes back here. Things look familiar in the way that they might have been part of a dream, once; cement and steel and dust and grime. She looks at the structures appraisingly, neither pleased nor displeased by them. They're just there. Just something that she might face, soon enough.]
[She's trained already, but she doesn't need rest, so she runs, fast and in as indirect a pattern as she can. Even stopping and starting, dodging imaginary pursuit, she's a blur, her eyes narrowed to slits against the dirt in the air. She learns the feel of the structures as she uses them for leverage when she hits top speed. It doesn't take long, too, before she's climbing, which is slower but not much.]
[Soon enough she finds herself at the top of an abandoned, half-constructed building, only a few stories tall but higher than anything she'd have found in Borogravia but a steeple. She sits with her feet hanging over the edge and considers her options from here. She has made her first decision, and now . . . here come all the rest.]
voice | 5/19, immediately post-paintball
Well. That was fun.
( ooc; SO i completely didn't do anything with paintball because of work, so feel free to assume anything re: mal being extremely serious about paintball once she actually learned the rules. she was 4th floor, blue team. )
Spam
[The gesture is telling. Mal watches it carefully.] Dinah?
Spam
[The wicked grin fades, though, as she considers her next answer.]
There was a flood that changed us into people we were...close to.
Spam
[The pause, she knows what this means and latches on to it. Now she's looking Barbara in the eye, dead on, because what she wants to know is if this is something that she's not talking about because it has to be a secret, or because she wants to keep it close.]
[Iris . . . shares. Because she can, because she has that luxury, and because she shares everything, it seems. But home, such that it is, is not a place of such luxury, not even for Mal. Not a place where such luxuries are even something most people can conceptualize.]
Spam
Dinah would talk about it.
The thought strikes her all at once, and a fond, rueful smile curves her lips. Yes, Dinah would be as open and unafraid as she always is.]
I didn't know I was in love with her, until that.
Spam
[She lets surprise wash off, and there's the vaguest hint of a smile, then.]
It shouldn't have been forced, I think.
[The realization. And she blinks slowly, then looks out intently at the landscape again, letting up some of the pressure. This is not a conversation she was expecting to have today.]
Spam
Maybe it's both. She'll take it.]
The Barge does a lot that it shouldn't.
[Her voice is soft as she, too, gazes at the ravaged city.]
Spam
[Even her abiding anger at the Admiral for what she thinks he is can't quite dissuade her from circling this idea. Iris had implied it - with her entire being, really, she had implied it; nothing about Iris would be acceptable under Nugganitic law. But Barbara is straightforward, in a completely not straightforward way, and - ]
[Well. The concept is fascinating, that there is a place somewhere that Barbara might feel safe being close to another woman without concern for her well-being. Directly, without skating the issue. Without tiptoeing. Without hiding.]
[There are people she wishes Barbara could meet, suddenly. Tonker especially, for all that they never got along that well - Barbara would like her.]
[Her eyes are narrowed at the horizon.]
Knowing that you love someone is not always helpful, or safe.
Spam
[For a lot of reasons, but especially when the world doesn't accept that love. Her gaze is thoughtful, now, as she looks at Mal.]
Do you have anyone?
[Her lips quirk, just slightly.]
Feel free to tell me to buzz off. [It's an intimate question, one she doesn't often ask outright.]
Spam
[Instead she derails, or tries to.]
Generally I choose to live outside of safety.
[So, maybe. Maybe not. She has people, but maybe not People.]
Spam
Me too.
[Not that she isn't cautious - she goes to great lengths to protect herself, nowadays. But she still takes risks, still dives into danger if it's necessary. She wouldn't be up here, otherwise.
She leans back, stretching her arms above her head. They still ache, but it's the good sort of pain.]
Safety is boring. Caution is all well and good, but if you let it rule your life you'll never do anything worthwhile.
Spam
[Now she smiles a bit.]
Tried safety. Didn't like it. And now I'm accomplishing so much more.
There should be more people like you, you know. Willing to take risks.
Spam
Spam
I'm glad you didn't try to deny it. You know what you are, and what you're capable of.
Not enough people do.
Spam
There was a time when I didn't. When I thought I couldn't make a difference any more. [A slight shrug.] Now, well. I make sure I don't forget.
Spam
[She says this quietly, but fiercely.]
It's important to hang onto, once you've got it.
[Which is sort of a confession. She's always known she was willing to take risks. She just didn't always know how to, or which ones were the right ones to take. Now she does - and makes sure she doesn't forget.]